Why You Should Deal With Deception in a Subtle Way

People don’t like being called out, especially on lies. An effective approach to achieving the goals that calling people out publicly brings, is to also do it subtly, so only you and the liar know the truth. A subtle call out looks like normal conversation, in which you only hint that you are aware of the truth and therefore their lie. Calling people out on lies in extravagant ways leads to negative feelings in the lie-teller towards you. This opens you up to more lies, more deception, and more disrespect. Deal with liars respectfully and subtly, and they will have a greater change of stopping their deceitful behavior towards you.

A subtle call-out will do two things:

1. It will show mercy to the liar, and show them that there are no ill feelings towards them lying.

This will make them feel like they got away with one, and that any more lies will be met with stricter punishment. They’ll have a feeling of gratefulness towards you showing mercy and not embarrassing them, therefore increasing the chances that they will tell you the truth from there-on-in.

2. It will not burn any bridges, and keep you in the loop of all things that the liar does for you, apart from lying.

An emotional call-out on a lie will put a stop to any form of relationships that you worked hard to develop with the liar.

Move through life treating those that try to harm you with respect, and you will have a greater chance of putting a stop to their behavior and not forming any enemies. We would say don’t take it personally, but lies, deception, and general evil are in fact very personal. This is the reason most people cannot remain calm in addressing deceptive behavior shown towards them. Keep calm and show mercy, but always remember what that person is capable of. The main goals of yours after you discover deception committed towards you are to put a stop to that behavior if you can, and not fall for any further deceptive actions by the other party.

Both of these goals will be completed if you subtly let the deceptive party know about your awareness of the situation. The subtle call-out can be in the form of mentioning the facts in passing conversation, addressing the true facts rather than the lies, and fully ignoring their attempts at deceptive actions and efforts to lure you in.

With this approach, you will keep track of your enemies and keep them close. The best way to handle those who deceive you is to keep tabs on them, and keep good relationships with them. Don’t burn bridges, and do not get heated, you might feel like embarrassing the person in question but will thank yourself for not doing so once you cool off.

Do not act in emotional ways in general, and especially with those who deceive you. Stay alert, stay aware, and stay in the know.

Book Recommendation:

The Art of Deception: Controlling the Human Element of Security

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