You shouldn't seek apologies at this very moment in time.

Why You Should Give People Time to Admit Their Wrongs

Time plays its role as a reliable friend as well as a hurtful foe. We’ve not been able to escape its steady trek onward. Good things will soon turn bad, the bad things soon turn good. People around us get sick and they get pregnant. Time dictates how many moments you have left with those you love, and how many thoughts you’ll think until you can’t manage any longer.

What time also does, is it makes it easier to admit our wrongs. Should enough time go by, even the most adamant rule-breakers and line-crossers are susceptible to admitting they were wrong. This article aims to motivate you to give others the time they need to admit their wrongs. If someone has wronged us, we are often too quick to seek apology and the assignment of blame. Without letting things simmer down and thoughts to ferment, people make insincere apologies and wrongfully assign blame.


Apologies Mean More When They’ve Been Pondered


People whose acts cause you pain will typically apologize should they understand the effect their actions have. Some feel so right, that even though their wrongfulness is established, their admittance of fault is sub-par. They will make insincere apologies and leave loose ends in assigning responsibility for the negative situation at hand. Just like yourself, others find it hard to swallow pride after heated moments. They need some time to simmer down. They need some time to consider regrets, and some time to admit their wrongdoings to themselves.

You’ll find that the apologies you receive are more sincere if you wait until others are ready to apologize rather than requesting apologies when you desire to hear them. Some won’t apologize at all, and that fact in itself should make you not want one from them. Others will sit on their wrongdoings and formulate articulate, sincere apologies. These are the apologies you should aim to receive – their existence being dependent on time. Giving someone time to think about an apology will encourage them to infuse their apology with regret. Regret takes a while to build up, and feelings of regret seem to increase with time in the short-term.


Understanding Is Not Developed Overnight


Disagreements between two people seldom end with one side completely accepting the position of the other. The closer it is in time to the disagreement in question, the less likely your opponent will agree with what you’ve proposed. As time goes by however, things may change. People sometimes wake up different people in the morning than they were the night prior, and should several mornings go by, their opinions may drastically change. Give others a chance to understand your positions by giving them time. Do not put pressure on others to agree with your arguments, and let them think about the points you’ve raised. If your position makes logical sense, trust it to ferment in the mind of another.

Giving someone time to understand your position will lower any emotional attachment they’ve built up to their own argument. As time goes by, they feel less passionate about what they’ve presented. Your points then become seeming decent, and understanding is likelier to be established.

Book Recommendation: 

How to Stop Worrying and Start Living

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